Have courage to cling to presence of God

George Irvine

I WONDER if, as a person of faith, you ever feel that God seems far away or even totally absent? The writer of Psalm 10 seems to be right there when he cries out, “Why, O Lord, do you hide yourself in times of trouble?”

I bet as a child you must have played hide and seek, but in the above difficult scenario God hides and we seek. There are many reasons for this, too many to outline, but in clinical depression God seems to disappear. There is no shame in feeling depressed, so seek medical help.

Other spiritual writers speak of a different scenario when they describe God’s absence as “the dark night of the soul”. This sounds threatening but all it means is that, no matter how many prayers we say or spiritual books we read, we feel “dead” inside. Fortunately this seldom happens to people who are new on the faith journey but it does happen to people who are much farther along the road and I have experienced it myself. Sometimes it is related to physical tiredness, so a couple of good nights’ sleep helps. When it is prolonged, I would encourage you to see it as God anaesthetising you so that He can do some inner surgical work on you.

Perhaps the worst sense of God being absent is when terrible things happen to us and we wonder where God is in all the mess. In times like these, I encourage people to listen to a prayer by Ettie Hilesum, a Dutch Jew. She was put on one of those ghastly trains heading for a concentration camp during the Second World War. She refused to accept that God was absent and here is the prayer she prayed. I have treasured it ever since I read it: “I shall try to help You, God, to stop my strength ebbing away, though I cannot vouch for it in advance. But one thing is becoming increasingly clear to me – that you cannot help us, that we must help You to help ourselves. And that is all we can manage these days and also all that really matters, that we safeguard that little piece of You, God in ourselves. And perhaps in others as well.

“Alas, there doesn't seem much You, Yourself, can do about our circumstances, about our lives. Not that I hold you responsible. You cannot help us, but we must help you to defend Your dwelling place inside us to the last.”

I want, like her, to have the courage to remind God He is present, especially in those times I feel He might have forgotten me.

George Irvine directs the Institute for Spirituality.